You ate how many calories?! Well it looks like I'm not getting any work done today.

I wish to talk about something very serious today.  a disease is plaguing our society, and I believe I am to be the voice for this underrepresented and ostracized community within society.  Sleep-eaters.  The true tragedy of society is the fact that so many people don't understand this devastating effects of this disease.  It is often relegated to the back of the classroom, while the cool kids; sleep walking, and night terrors, get to sit up at the front.  Before we discuss the truly easy cure for this disease, let me share with you the plight of one man, S (I told you he couldn't keep crazy to himself for very long).

Last night, after what I considered to be a really productive day, I decided to reward myself by buying me a treat--salt and vinegar chips.  This quick trip to the grocery store resulted in three heads of red leaf lettuce, sun dried tomatoes, and all the ingredients for two recipes, one of which I will detail shortly.  It also included chips, which I almost forgot was the reason I went in the store in the first place until I was standing at the checkout counter.

I had spent a little bit of time on pinterest, and can safely say that I am responsible for the birth of this little recipe, which is an amalgamation of two things I saw on the site; shepherds pie, and a cheesy something-or-other.

1 1/2 lb of ground beef
1 onion
1 bag tater tots
1 can cream of celery soup
parsley
cheese
salt and pepper to taste

saute the beef, onion and seasoning.  mix in the celery soup.  Pour that all over the tater tots.  cover with cheese and bake at 350 until you just can't wait any longer.  Then eat.

this actually made my house smell amazing, so while I was watching a mid-week movie with S I just kept thinking that it didn't matter how late it was, I was starving.  There was something magical about the parsley and onion, and there was the faint smell of burning cheese, which for some reason brings back memories of childhood.

I used my largest casserole dish to make this meal, which was only barely adequate.  Furthermore, I only had one tupperware container large enough to hold it all in the fridge.  Being the paragon of self control, I decided it was against my best interest to eat something so great so late at night, so I simply wrapped it all up and put it in the fridge, and went to sleep with the calm assurance that I would have a great meal the next day.  And when I say, "the next day" I mean the next day.  leftovers don't last long in my house.  B usually takes some to school for lunch, as do I, and S, eats whenever he is home.

I will freely admit that my drive home was full of anticipation for this meal because I could remember how great it smelled while it was cooking.  I walked into my kitchen, and for the first time in a long time, all three of us were home.  B, eating cereal, and S cleaning the dishes.  This was pleasant, because we don't often get to hang out, and while I at first saw this as a blessing towards greater fraternity and camaraderie  I realized, only much later, that it was, in fact, the swift arm of justice, gathering us together to officiate the most meaningful witch hunt since those tolerant spanish monks burned those terrible women for....whatever it was I'm sure they did.
After putting down all of my gear I walked to the fridge to grab some of the leftovers.

"uhhhhhhh guys.  who ate all the casserole?" I asked, truly puzzled.  That was a lot of food, and I was a little concerned that it was gone.  I looked around to see if it had maybe just been left on the counter.  I noticed that B hadn't even taken off his backpack before burying his face in a bowl of churro cereal.  Cereal wasn't desert, that was the main course, so I assumed he hadn't eaten any of it.

"I didn't!" exclaimed B.  I took some of the other leftovers for lunch today.
"I didn't either" chimed in S.

Clearly we were in the midst of a conundrum.  If I hadn't eaten it, and B hadn't eaten it, and S hadn't eaten, then WHY IN THE FREAKIN' HECK WASN'T THERE ANY FOOD IN MY FRIDGE!

This little dialogue continued for several minutes.  I explained that there were two separate containers, and that when I left this this morning, both of them were full of food.  Now there was only one contained of food.  S admitted that he had "tried" some of the casserole, but that he promised he didn't eat it all.  
After some very convincing visual demonstrations and reenactments on my part, it was determined that S, in fact, had eaten the entire casserole.
What is truly frightening about this is not the fact that S ate a lb and a half of beef, a huge bag of tater tots, soup, onion, etc, AND a lb of cheese.  No, no.  The frightening thing is that he apparently did this all without knowing about it.

You are probably asking yourself, "but what can I do?  I am just one person, and this problem seems so vast, and has been neglected for so long.  Surely we can't correct it now."  On the contrary.  There is something you can do.  please send all the cash and food you have to me.  I love cooking, and I love that my roommates love my food, but if I'm going to be feeding, what is essentially the metabolisms of two teenage boys, AND a sleep eater, all while feeding myself, I'm going to need a few more hours in the day, plus another job.  The money thing isn't so much an issue.  the issue is that baking takes up a lot of time, and when I bake, I tend to use it as an excuse to not do anything else. I inevitably say to myself, "Ohhhhh I can't possible read my homework in the kitchen.  what if something splatters and ruins my used textbook?  I'll never be able to sell it back for $3. Then where would I be?"
That is the problem.  And as you can see from the time stamp, it is almost 3AM, and I've done jack-squat today, in the way of homework.  Writing this post didn't help either, so I should probably just finish and go to bed.